Red Bull Racing F1
Image © CNS/Paul Haring/Aston Martin Red Bull Racing/Twitter

Red Bull unveiled their RB15 online on Wednesday, and fans across the globe are praying that the new red and blue livery is not just for testing, but for the entire season.

Their prayers were led by Pope Francis himself, in a special service at the Vatican.

“Il nome di padre, e figlio, e spirito, santo” the Pope led thousands of devout followers in prayer, before catching a glimpse of the RB15.

“It looks sick!” His Holiness decreed.

“Let us pray” the Pope said, bowing his head, “that this paint job sticks around after Barcelona”

“Amen” replied the masses.  

“Would you please stand for our first Hymn” a Cardinal decreed, “Wannabe by Geri Horner”

The service, lasting over two hours, included prayers, psalms and readings from How To Build A Car: The Autobiography of the World’s Greatest Formula 1 Designer by Adrian Newey.

The Pope was dressed in his testing livery of white on white with white stripes, opting for the SuperSoft papal vestments.

“In these times that test our faith” the Pope continued “we must all ask ourselves – how will the Honda power unit perform in the Red Bull chassis?”

The Pontiff made the remarks at a special mass, where he was excommunicated Ricciardo from the Red Bull Technology Centre, and proclaiming Adrian Newey a Saint.

“How he got within a few tenths of Mercedes and Ferrari with that Renault engine and power deficit last year, is a miracle” Pope Francis said.

His Holiness went on to implore other world leaders to send their blessings like Archbishop Desmond Tutu, The Dalai Lama and Kim K.

“Has anyone got a number for Beyoncé??” the Pontiff asked the crowd.

The mass was the first mass under the new 2019 regulations, requiring a simplifying of the front hymn to make it easier to follow.


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