Michael Baxter has today informed his colleagues at Subway that he has quit to properly pursue Formula One Fantasy.
In his farewell speech, the qualified Sandwich Artist explained he had a burning desire for more than just making a Spicy Italian Meatball 6-Inch sub.
“It’s time to get serious with my life and focus on my F1 Fantasy team.”
The 2-time Subway ‘Employee of the Month’, spoke of how his work was ultimately a distraction from the thing that actually gets him out of bed each morning.
“I wasn’t switched on mentally last year,” he told the other 3 staff members present whilst holding back tears.
“I put my Double Points on Sergei Sirotkin and halfway through the season I swapped out Max for Stoffel… How foolish can one man be?”
Baxter then assured everyone that this season would different, and that with new found time on his hands, fantasy success was imminent.
“Yeah a mate was telling me that his mate’s brother-in-law’s’ ex-wife’s cousin worked out there’s glitch in the site that gets you unlimited driver swaps!”
The news of Baxter’s departure from the store came as a shock to fellow employees.
Acting Supervisor of the Salads, Rohan, couldn’t believe it.
“There’s a Fantasy game for F1??”
Baxter’s parents, who were waiting to drive Michael home after his final shift, explained that managing an F1 team has always been their son’s dream.
“As a child he used to stare at his Ron Dennis poster every night before bed.” Recounted Michael’s softly spoken mother, Mary.
“That’s all well and good Mary, but did Ron Dennis still live at home at age 37?” Quipped Michaels father Barry.
Baxter concluded his 27 minute long farewell speech in rousing fashion.
“I just want to prove to any little kid out there that anyone can manage an F1 team if they have the grit and determination to do it … that and also a computer with strong internet connection.”
